So I'm a little bitter. Not over-the-top, spot-me-from-two-miles-away angry or anything, but I do tend to scream at the people in other cars while I'm driving. Recently I noticed this weird pattern that crops up whenever I get cut off en route--an oddly high number of these *ahem* hacking MORONS are driving the Chevy Impala. What is it about this obviously gorgeous, stylish, and all around classy looking car that attracts this group of people? Couldn't tell you. The Impala is, however, a middle-sized, middle-price, reliable sedan that an extraordinary number of idiots are inexplicably drawn to.
The first explanation I came up with is that there are simply a lot of Impalas that live in my area, or that drive on similar routes.
This is plausible, but what struck me next is that an impala is a type of gazelle, which makes it extremely related to a deer. What are deer famous for? JUMPING IN FRONT OF CARS.